Photo Title: Live Mirror
Activated by the tears of momentary regret and hopelessness.
Spaces between are the clarity of needed renewal,
and the brilliant light of optimistic potential.
My crashing life held in tact by both the real and illusory branches of the shedding trees.
There is motion.
I am part of this moving ecosystem.
The rhythmic echoes sustain me.
The live mirror is life.
I am alive.
And I will move forward.
The Obvious and The Hidden is one of my favorite blogs to follow. The titles that are applied to his amazing photography are perfection! I was searching through the history, since it’s been a good while that I’ve been on wordpress, and I went to May 10th- my sobriety date (2014). Note: this photo may be found in 2015. I was moved to remember that day and combine it with the success of today when writing this piece- a little over 17 months clean/sober and feeling great! I kind of dropped off wordpress at that time. Which is crazy!!! My, how time flies!! I was soooo active before. Miss all you guys. Trying to jump back in. Peace to you all.
Pain cuts deep.
Past the surface.
Through bone and flesh.
What happens next…
The lies I once believed,
The whispers in my ears.
The fear born deep within,
Accepting as truth, what I would hear.
Following the insidious leadings,
Into the realm of self destruction.
Smothered by a heavy darkness,
To which I’d helplessly succumb.
Now that power has faded.
Lies replaced with God’s truth.
Fear is buffered within me,
By a shield of faith I lift and use.
I can resist the temptation, when hurt,
Which once locked me in chains.
Tonight I did not drink or use,
Only God could make that change…
The jumping off place,
Pursued by familiar disaster.
Flames, whirling winds,
Consuming the ground
on which you stand.
No time to consider,
You’ve waited too long.
Close your eyes.
Take a breath and let go.
I can’t describe the devastation
The ache within my soul
I really thought this was my last go round
That I’d stay clean and sober, I’d grown
My failing incites hopeless despair
Suggests a lack of progress
I’m so disappointed I must start again
Seems such a futile conquest
My immature reaction grieves me
I want to “make the most” of this relapse
Use and drink as much as I can
Enthusiastically I gravitate to pure collapse
I hear the destructiveness
I hear the surrender and defeat
Yet, I’m grateful God has placed within
Many reasons to hope and believe…
New sobriety date May, 10, 2014
These recent “relapse poems” were written while I was in active drinking/using. I’m feeling much better today. I did not lose all I learned in the one year, three months, and five days I was clean/sober. I have to start the counter again… But I’ve learned so much. Thanks for reading guys. Much love.
Ever changing maze
No beginning and no end
Guides along the simple path
Leading to freedom
For today’s prompt, write a monster poem. There are the usual suspects: zombies, vampires, werewolves, and mummies. But monsters can take any form and terrorize a variety of victims.
The monster’s in wait
He is always hungry, yet
Grows strong without food…
©E.D. Allee April, 2014