I happened to run into a person I knew on an acquaintance level in AA- at a hospital AA meeting. This is not a meeting I go too. She is inpatient for detox and drug/alcohol rehab. There is more to the back story, but in general our reconnecting seemed quite supernaturally guided. Hope you are all well.
Witness to a familiar despair.
Eyes filled with tears, yet void of hope.
Questions swirling in unorganized fury.
Where to from here? You do not know.
Behind heavy, locked doors,
Flashlights frequent your closed eyelids.
Rows of rooms filled with strangers,
An energy of demoralization exists.
Well perfected masks, cracking all around.
Truths withheld due to fear.
Pseudo camaraderie, thirsty to connect.
Afraid to stay, and afraid to go back “out there”
Battered by cruel and abusive emotions,
Lies hauntingly scream of future failure.
Heart and mind blocked from receiving,
Help from those who’ve been there.
You can’t recall arriving.
Twenty eight days, one pair of clothes.
No friends or family to call,
Feeling isolated, pathologically alone.
I’m glad I saw you; I’m sure that was God.
We hadn’t spoken since last year.
Simply AA acquaintances, yet I felt an intuitive pull,
A new meeting, I’m sure God brought me there.
I pray for God to show me how to help.
I pray you receive it…