When I address my reflective sight,
I see regret’s birth and nurtured growth.
Brick upon brick of wrong choices,
In valid confidence or carelessness I chose.
The wall I erected and enshrined,
Has mostly collapsed into mounds.
Present in pieces only,
Shifting slowly into my past’s hollowed grounds.
Yet portions of the wall,
Reinforced by recollection’s steel.
Remain sturdy and strong,
I even think I see a new tier.
On that wall, my biggest regrets…
I often consider how ungrateful I used to be,
The endless days spent immersed in self-pity.
How long I lived seeing no one but me.
Rarely recognizing the multitude of blessings I knew.
Focusing on all the hurt and wrongs caused by “you”.
Seeing only reason for anger and resentments upon review.
But, Now I see, eyes perhaps too open.
I’ve been given so much,
Family and provision to sustain me.
Trauma, abuse, but strength to endure,
Often walking dead, yet gifted to breathe.
No matter my pain at any time,
There’s always one who suffers more.
I was so blind to what I had,
Rich in much, living spiritually poor.
Forgive me Father,
For not seeing the truth.
That all the while I justified my rebellion,
I should have been thanking You…