Poetic Journey in Personal Discovery

Snapshot…

If I’d of pressed the shutter button,
Capturing my emotions.
On this night of further testing,
Of dangerous-waters to fall in.

It would be clear, I’m somewhat tangled,
Like compacted vines after a ferocious flood…
————–
The only estrogen present,
Usually not a big deal.
I think like a dude more than I should,
But tonight’s mirror was way too real.

My heart wasn’t in the old “hearty talk”.
I know enough about the female anatomy.
Yet I found myself merging to blend in,
By adding my inappropriate two “chick pennies”.
Familiar games from back in the day,
I’m just one of the guys.
My husband’s very familiar with that “E”
Maybe that’s why he was content by my side.

And what of all my surroundings?!
To my front, left and right,
Vodka, jäger, tequila…
In a bar with a mechanical bull to ride???

Hmmm… Really doesn’t sound that bad on rewind.
Hot chick waitresses, people dancing,
The smell of breathing liquor in the air,
Yet I was trapped in a seductive entrancing.

Present, away, back, then gone again,
Smiling, joking, inserting my careless wit.
All the while choking back the need to run,
Crawling, not quickly enough, out of my skin.

I could have left. I had a key to my hotel. It wasn’t far to walk.

But I didn’t leave.

I could have.

But I didn’t.

I DID, however, survive…

A little worn from a poorly fought battle,
Some shaky, soft lessons to assimilate.
Although I’m not impressed with me,
I’m not going to needlessly dwell on my mistakes.

God knows my heart, and my “floaties” didn’t pop.
While I know He’s not particularly proud,
We’ve spoken on the matter,
And I’m thankful His mercy ever abounds!

©E.D. Allee
February, 2014

Note: No alcoholics were harmed in the making of this snap shot. I’m still sober!

 

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Comments on: "Snapshot…" (2)

  1. Oh, bless your dear heart. I think God’s a lot easier on us than we are on ourselves. I don’t think I could have handled the atmosphere–smells and stuff–I’ve been away from it all too long. And I love your end “note”–very cool, you are! God bless you.

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