Poetic Journey in Personal Discovery

The Boogie Man inside my head

Seeks my annihilation, wants me dead…

He tells me things I “need” to know

Things to do, where to go

He lurks in the shadows and corners of an already haunted head

And continues to taunt me awake in the day or at night in bed

I try to drown him out and set my true thoughts free

But more and more I feel his pull and attempts to fully enslave me

His claws get sharper with each false and fearful conclusion to which I succumb

And there are trails of his saliva staining the pathways of my brain now overrun

He’s been there all along, not in my closet or under my bed

He’s been there from the beginning, living inside my head

He feeds me lies, and when able, cancels out the truths

Reality is blurred, and when presented with good and bad thoughts, I find it hard to choose

Seems the negative screams louder than the positive thoughts I hold

So I have to listen more intently to gather the actual truths which are told

I’m not exactly sure when he entered, but I know I was very young

And while loyalty is admirable, in this case I wish there was none

I can sometimes hold him at bay by praying to my God for safety

Yet he has a stronghold such that I reopen the door out of fear, unable to flee

I need his permanent removal from my mind, his chosen stead

Who can exterminate the boogie man breeding havoc in my head?

____________________________________________________________________________

To the boogie man inside my head

I want you gone, I want you dead…

I hear you crawling with joints aching from decay and rot

You can no longer move without detection, you are caught

I smell your hideous breath as you speak your arrows

And where it is that you creep, I no longer have to follow

You’ve taken up residence in my brain for too long; I have a say in who may live here

You are not welcome; you are banished! I seek freedom from negativity and fear

You have to flee when I speak it out loud; I no longer am fooled by your guile

Flee boogie man! I see your natural form of darkness and lies and I am no longer a child

In a plume of grim smoke I watch you disappear

Much easier than I could have imagined, how sad I’ve waited so many years

I have a long road ahead to be free from all you’ve taught me over time

But now the chains are off, and it’s the real me I seek to find

The me behind the masks you and I carefully constructed together

The me who runs away, hides, and cowers

I find my legs are sturdy and no longer quiver; I am capable of standing strong

And I’m back under the direction of light now, where I’ve always belonged…

©E.D. Allee
2012
darkness into light
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