Poetic Journey in Personal Discovery

I Once Knew It All…

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When I was younger I thought I knew everything- I thought this because I DID!
I had to do things according to me, ignoring counsel from those who had lived
My version of “everything”, upon reflection, was quite narrowly defined
And now that I’m older I think myself wiser… but am careful not to think myself wise

It takes some living to learn it is said, experience, a great teacher in the school of life
Yet I find myself feeling regret and disappointment for many decisions I’ve made over time
The things I said, the actions I took, the paths I once treaded fearlessly
Were based on the cerebral gems I collected while traveling on my own unique journey
Although my mind was open and I was growing, some of the truths I adopted were delusions
If I had known then the things I know now, just maybe, I’d of made better decisions

But I have to question my self-condemnation; it’s unfounded and meaningless
A harsh critique of a life lived with good intentions and courage

Was I not to have acted boldly and with confidence in the face of life’s every circumstance?
Was I to hide away until I arrived at some expected state of illusory relevance?

Through hindsight’s glasses everyone’s an informed critic, like they’ve always held their current convictions
There is error in judging others who lack the insight we’ve gained; consider where they are and where they have been

I strive to turn new information into revelation and then pass it on to those who might benefit
And I want to watch and listen to others who impart their experiential gifts
I admit my mind was once closed to the counsel of other’s because, again, I knew it all
I was finding my way the only way I knew how and part of learning has come through my falls
Even today I have to challenge myself to accept help and learn from those who’ve already been burned by the flames
The pull toward self-reliance serves to block my potential for growth and gain

Many have been part of my personal story, some intentional, some passive, some in word, some in deed
All I’ve encountered in life to this point has helped shape me into me
That “me” is changing every moment, each day I’m allowed new breath
And I welcome the changes on my way to discover the me I’ve not yet met

©E.D. Allee
August 24, 2013

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